Everything’s Better in a Red Swimsuit

Lt. Mitch Buchannon isn’t your typical lifeguard. And new recruit Matt Brody definitely isn’t your typical two-time Olympic gold medalist. Throw these two together and things are bound to get wild. Add some push-up swimwear and a newly drug-infested bay to the mix? Now you’ve got a comedy.


BAYWATCH — 8.3 of 10


No Spoiler Synopsis

Baywatch is kind of a legend. They’re flashy, sexy, and pretty much everyone wants to be on the team. Tough luck, though, ’cause Mitch and his people aren’t about to let just anybody slip into that signature bright red swimsuit. No small cup sizes allowed.

Things take an unexpected turn when Captain Thorpe calls in washed-up ex-Olympic swimmer Matt Brody in an attempt to rejuvenate the bay with a little celebrity-turned-local-lifeguard publicity. It doesn’t take long for Buchannon to realize that turning Brody into a lifeguard worthy of his bay is gonna take more than a little work, and he decides to get his new ward up to speed using his method of choice—tough love. But party boy Brody isn’t the only problem the badass lifeguard lieutenant has on his hands. Someone’s started running hardcore drugs in the bay. Local police tell Mitch to stay out of it, but that’s not really his style. Buchannon soon finds himself swimming out of his depth, and when people start disappearing, things become much more sinister than expected.


What to Expect

Two things you can definitely count on going in to this movie: Alexandra Daddario’s eyes are bluer than a laser (like, Luke Skywalker’s light saber’s got nothing on them), and Zac Efron is RIPPED—we’re talking seriously shredded. Pretty sure I was motivated for about 24 hours after seeing the movie to really start pumping iron full-time. Then I remembered how much of a time commitment that is, and I decided hating my life wasn’t worth it just for washboard abs. Anyway. . .

In this film reboot of the 90s hit TV series, Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson gives his current edgy take on Mitch Buchannon (formerly played by David Hasselhoff) in a movie that’s more sexy and fun than anything. Lots of skin, innuendo, beautiful people, and a few vulgar jokes make this a movie for viewers who appreciate humor gone wild. The story is simple, but pulled off well, with a touch of character development (definitely not the primary goal of the plot) balanced with humor and action. Baywatch is a tongue-in-cheek flick firing at (and for the most part hitting) a balance between fast-paced if not-too-deep action movie with a distinct crime-fighting side. It’s extremely entertaining, with well-timed moments poking fun at self and the cheesy traditions that go along with this kind of film. Zac Efron plays fallen-from-favor ex-Olympian Matt Brody, new recruit to Baywatch who takes life just a bit less seriously than Lt. Buchannon. Sports Illustrated hottie Kelly Rohrbach plays eye candy C. J. Parker (formerly played by Pamela Anderson), and laser-eyed Alexandra Daddario plays Summer Quinn, a local recruited to the team about the same time Brody arrived to join the lifeguards. The cast has effortless chemistry, and the perpetual insult repartee that the film is drenched in is satisfyingly authentic.


In Conclusion

Baywatch won’t be receiving any award nominations, but it was never meant to. It’s not movie of the year material, but it does what it set out to do pretty well. It’s a entertainingly cheesy and larger-than-life comedic action movie with a streak of crime. It’s sexy, lighthearted, and intensely amusing. This is a great movie if you want to sit down, relax, and have a laugh at the expense of numerous scantily-clad killers delivered right to your screen. If that’s what you’re looking for, give it a shot. Chances are you won’t be disappointed.


BAYWATCH – 8.3 of 10